Lately, I’ve been feeling mentally cloudy and overwhelmed, so I decided to pause for a moment and reflect.
I realized I’ve been thinking too much about other people—especially those who have criticized me in the past. Even though I haven’t seen them in years, my mind imagines their criticism, and the weight of that imagined judgment keeps growing, filling me with frustration and unease.
These people seem to be enjoying their lives, and that contrast created a false sense of inferiority in me, as if I deserve to be criticized or that I’m inherently behind. That thinking is not only incorrect, but harmful.
There is no need to win or lose in comparison with others. What truly matters is how we spend our unique time and energy. But because the lives of others often appear more “visible,” my focus and attention had been unintentionally drifting away from myself.
It’s time to reclaim that focus.
We should direct our attention toward the things that truly matter to us. Comparing yourself to others is optional, unnecessary, and has no real benefit. If anything, it’s a distraction. And I believe it’s important to gently remind ourselves—and others—of that truth.
Yes, our focus may naturally shift toward others at times. But we must stay aware: when that focus becomes so strong that we forget our own priorities, it becomes excessive.
So, what’s truly important to you?
When answering that, you must let go of other people’s opinions. Ask yourself:
- What do I truly enjoy? (Again, don’t think about other people’s opinions)
- What gives me a sense of meaning and fulfillment? (Again, don’t think about other people’s opinions)
- What goals or activities align with my life purpose? (Again, don’t think about other people’s opinions)
- What are my “current seasonal themes” or interests? (Again, don’t think about other people’s opinions)
- Where do I see seeds of growth, hope, or potential? (Again, don’t think about other people’s opinions)
These are questions I often use to bring my focus back to myself.
And here’s one simple tool that helps me: the “My Things List.”
It’s a bullet-point list of what’s important to me right now. Sometimes I also add in my current “seasonal themes” or interests.
Having this list gives me a sense of emotional grounding.
Without it, I’m much more vulnerable to the sparkle of others’ social media lives, and I begin to feel empty or stagnant—like I’m falling behind.
But when I go back to my list, I reconnect with my path. Everything should start from this list. These are the things that are truly important to me.
So I invite you to try it.
Just answer those self-reflection questions and write them down in bullet form. That alone can help you feel your focus gently shifting back where it belongs: with you.
If you have your own ways to reset your focus, I’d love to hear them—feel free to share.
About Me: Hi, I’m Evolving Mind. Through this blog, I share my journey of self-discovery and mental well-being. Journaling has been a powerful tool for me, and I hope to inspire others to find their own path to peace and clarity. You can learn more about my journey in my post, Welcome to the Journey of the Mind by Evolving Mind.
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